1
00:00:02,422 --> 00:00:05,995
- [ Rings]
- Hello?
2
00:01:13,627 --> 00:01:15,573
I can remember it very clearly.
3
00:01:15,629 --> 00:01:18,974
I was 1 O years old, and on Christmas morning
when I came downstairs...
4
00:01:19,032 --> 00:01:21,638
I saw this beautiful,
bright red, shiny bicycle.
5
00:01:21,701 --> 00:01:24,079
I knew this Christmas was going to
be different from all the rest.
6
00:01:24,137 --> 00:01:26,515
- Oh, that's nice.
- But it wasn't.
7
00:01:26,573 --> 00:01:30,248
The bicycle was for my brother.
8
00:01:30,310 --> 00:01:33,382
Well, I'm sure there were presents
under the tree for you, Barry.
9
00:01:33,446 --> 00:01:36,689
A corduroy Windbreaker
and six pair of jockey shorts.
10
00:01:38,752 --> 00:01:40,823
Well, look at it this way, Barry.
11
00:01:40,887 --> 00:01:43,265
Your parents obviously
loved you very much...
12
00:01:43,323 --> 00:01:45,269
because they gave you
a present...
13
00:01:45,325 --> 00:01:48,135
- that would make you feel warm.
- And secure.
14
00:01:48,195 --> 00:01:51,768
You know, I never thought of it
that way before.
15
00:01:51,832 --> 00:01:54,472
Well, see, that's one of the advantages
of group therapy.
16
00:01:54,534 --> 00:01:56,480
I mean, by sharing
our experiences...
17
00:01:56,536 --> 00:01:59,540
we get insights we wouldn't
have gotten by ourselves.
18
00:01:59,606 --> 00:02:03,713
I think we've spent enough time talking
about bad Christmas experiences.
19
00:02:03,777 --> 00:02:07,919
Let's spend some time talking
about good Christmas experiences.
20
00:02:10,684 --> 00:02:12,459
anybody-
21
00:02:13,820 --> 00:02:16,733
Well, uh,
Christmas can be tough.
22
00:02:18,525 --> 00:02:21,472
- But lmean there are good things.
- N a m e o n e.
23
00:02:23,697 --> 00:02:28,373
Well, uh, things like, uh...
24
00:02:28,435 --> 00:02:30,381
gifts.
25
00:02:35,942 --> 00:02:37,979
Uh, decorations.
26
00:02:39,079 --> 00:02:41,320
Snow.
27
00:02:41,381 --> 00:02:45,420
And those Santy Clauses ringing their bells
on the street corners.
28
00:02:45,485 --> 00:02:48,193
They depress me
more than anything.
29
00:02:48,255 --> 00:02:51,998
- Why?
- Well, you know where they get them. Skid row.
30
00:02:52,058 --> 00:02:54,538
Poor guys only work
one week a year.
31
00:02:54,594 --> 00:02:57,700
Whenever I see one, I feel so sorry for him
I give him every penny I have.
32
00:02:57,764 --> 00:02:59,710
That makes me very sad.
33
00:02:59,766 --> 00:03:02,372
I'm feeling a kind of tightness
in my stomach right now.
34
00:03:02,435 --> 00:03:04,813
It's like a lump.
A big, heavy lump.
35
00:03:04,871 --> 00:03:07,647
Oh, I know that lump.
36
00:03:07,707 --> 00:03:12,156
Well, before we get
too far into the lump, uh...
37
00:03:12,212 --> 00:03:15,853
I think now would be a good time
to end our meeting for today.
38
00:03:15,916 --> 00:03:19,591
I want you to remember that Christmas
can be a very loving time.
39
00:03:19,653 --> 00:03:23,624
And, uh, I'm going to tell you now
what my Christmas present is.
40
00:03:23,690 --> 00:03:25,636
There won't be any charge
for this session.
41
00:03:25,692 --> 00:03:30,004
- Oh, isn't that nice?
- I feel real good.
42
00:03:30,063 --> 00:03:33,408
[Woman] Dr, Hartley,
you're a truly beautiful person.
43
00:03:34,935 --> 00:03:37,313
- Hi, honey.
- Hold it. Don't move.
44
00:03:37,370 --> 00:03:39,316
What's the matter?
45
00:03:40,840 --> 00:03:43,081
Mistletoe.
46
00:03:43,143 --> 00:03:45,123
- Oh, good.
- Yeah.
47
00:03:50,283 --> 00:03:52,229
Hold it.
48
00:03:56,189 --> 00:03:58,863
- There's no mistletoe here.
- I know. That was a freebie.
49
00:04:00,293 --> 00:04:02,239
Why are you so late?
Where have you been?
50
00:04:02,295 --> 00:04:04,241
I was, uh, out shopping
for your present.
51
00:04:04,297 --> 00:04:07,335
Oh, yeah?
What'd you buy me?
52
00:04:07,400 --> 00:04:10,210
Nothing.
53
00:04:10,270 --> 00:04:12,216
Yet.
54
00:04:12,272 --> 00:04:14,377
Honey, you wouldn't believe,
the stores are so crowded.
55
00:04:14,441 --> 00:04:17,752
I stood in line in one store
for 1 O minutesjust to get out.
56
00:04:17,811 --> 00:04:21,315
Oh, honey, well,
just sit down and relax.
57
00:04:21,381 --> 00:04:24,885
I'll fix you a drink.
it'll get your mind off Christmas gifts.
58
00:04:27,654 --> 00:04:31,192
What do you think I should buyyour Uncle Harry
and Aunt May? I <:an't think of a thing.
59
00:04:31,257 --> 00:04:34,431
- What did we send them last year?
- A basket of fruit.
60
00:04:34,494 --> 00:04:36,974
Well, they should have
eaten it by now.
61
00:04:40,834 --> 00:04:43,314
Send them another basket of fruit.
Fruit's always nice.
62
00:04:43,370 --> 00:04:45,976
Well, should I send them
the three-dollar basket...
63
00:04:46,039 --> 00:04:49,020
the seven-dollar basket
or the $20 basket?
64
00:04:49,075 --> 00:04:51,783
- What'd they send us last year?
- Nothing.
65
00:04:51,845 --> 00:04:54,451
Well, then why are we
sending them anything?
66
00:04:54,514 --> 00:04:56,892
- Bob.
- You're right.
67
00:04:56,950 --> 00:04:59,658
You know, I cannot believe
how mercenary I sounded.
68
00:04:59,719 --> 00:05:02,199
I mean, the fact that they
didn't send anything to us...
69
00:05:02,255 --> 00:05:04,462
- doesn't mean we shouldn't send
something to them. - Right.
70
00:05:04,524 --> 00:05:08,904
Send them the, uh,
the three-dollar basket.
71
00:05:09,996 --> 00:05:12,772
Okay, I'll put it on the list.
72
00:05:12,832 --> 00:05:16,075
Oh, Bob, what do you think
we should get for Howard?
73
00:05:16,136 --> 00:05:18,912
I mean, fruit's no good, 'cause he can
get all he wants on the airplane.
74
00:05:18,972 --> 00:05:21,953
Howard can get anything
he wants on the airplane.
75
00:05:23,309 --> 00:05:25,755
Well, I don't know.
I thought shoes.
76
00:05:25,812 --> 00:05:29,021
- Shoes?
- Yeah, you know, like for his feet.
77
00:05:30,683 --> 00:05:34,187
Yeah, I know shoes are for feet,
but why for Howard's?
78
00:05:34,254 --> 00:05:36,996
Well, Howard wears
his airline shoes with everything.
79
00:05:37,057 --> 00:05:39,731
He even wears them
when he plays tennis.
80
00:05:39,793 --> 00:05:42,034
Bob, do you know
what shoe size Howard is?
81
00:05:42,095 --> 00:05:46,544
Howard has told me a lot of personal,
intimate things about himself...
82
00:05:48,234 --> 00:05:50,976
but I don't recall him
ever telling me his shoe size.
83
00:05:51,037 --> 00:05:53,984
- [Knocking]
- I'll get it.
84
00:05:57,077 --> 00:06:00,786
- Hi, Emily. Hi, Bob.
- Oh, Howard. Mistletoe.
85
00:06:02,115 --> 00:06:04,823
Oh, I'll have to
get myself some of that.
86
00:06:04,884 --> 00:06:07,694
L, uh, came over to bring you
your Christmas present.
87
00:06:07,754 --> 00:06:10,132
Oh, thank you.
I'll put it under the tree.
88
00:06:10,190 --> 00:06:12,898
- Sit down, Howard.
- Ah, thank you.
89
00:06:12,959 --> 00:06:15,098
[Clattering]
90
00:06:16,463 --> 00:06:20,377
Oh, boy, that feels good.
91
00:06:20,433 --> 00:06:22,435
[Sighs]
92
00:06:32,178 --> 00:06:35,216
- Nice shoes.
- Yeah, these are my airline shoes.
93
00:06:35,281 --> 00:06:37,227
You'd never know it, would you?
94
00:06:37,283 --> 00:06:41,060
What do you take, Howard,
a 9, 9 1/2, 10?
95
00:06:41,121 --> 00:06:43,397
Why?
96
00:06:43,456 --> 00:06:46,699
I don't know. A bunch of the guys
were sitting over a beer today.
97
00:06:46,759 --> 00:06:50,605
We got to talking about shoe sizes.
I was just curious.
98
00:06:50,663 --> 00:06:55,237
I don't know what shoe size I wear.
It's been so long since I bought shoes.
99
00:06:55,301 --> 00:06:57,508
Take a look here.
See what it says.
100
00:06:57,570 --> 00:07:01,279
- Uh-oh.
- What does it say?
101
00:07:01,341 --> 00:07:05,949
“Captain A.j. Winston.“
These are Winston's shoes.
102
00:07:06,012 --> 00:07:08,959
They must have gotten switched
during that party in Sweden.
103
00:07:09,015 --> 00:07:11,291
[Emily]
Well, uh--
104
00:07:11,351 --> 00:07:14,093
Uh, Howard, what size
does Winston wear?
105
00:07:14,154 --> 00:07:16,395
Oh, I don't know.
It's all rubbed off.
106
00:07:16,456 --> 00:07:18,402
What size do you wear, Bob?
107
00:07:18,458 --> 00:07:20,404
Uh, 8 1/2
108
00:07:20,460 --> 00:07:23,236
I'll tell you what.
Why don't you take off your shoes...
109
00:07:23,296 --> 00:07:25,867
and put on Winston's shoes
and we'll see what the difference is.
110
00:07:25,932 --> 00:07:27,912
That way we'll be able
to figure out what size I wear.
111
00:07:32,672 --> 00:07:34,743
You like fruit,
don't you, Howard?
112
00:07:37,210 --> 00:07:40,123
-I love fruit.
- You can put your shoe on, Howard.
113
00:07:40,180 --> 00:07:42,126
[Sighs]
Well, I've gotta go anyway.
114
00:07:42,182 --> 00:07:44,253
I'm celebrating Christmas
with my son this evening.
115
00:07:44,317 --> 00:07:47,196
- Aren't you four days early?
- Yeah, he's going to Duluth...
116
00:07:47,253 --> 00:07:49,426
to be with his grandma
for Christmas.
117
00:07:49,489 --> 00:07:51,435
I'm giving him
his present tonight.
118
00:07:51,491 --> 00:07:54,301
Emily, uh,
you're a clever person.
119
00:07:54,360 --> 00:07:58,740
How do you gift wrap a puppy?
You know, something like a little ribbon...
120
00:07:58,798 --> 00:08:01,404
so it looks more like a gift,
rather than just a clog.
121
00:08:01,467 --> 00:08:03,970
Oh, I'll see what I can find
in the den.
122
00:08:09,709 --> 00:08:11,814
Did you get Emily's gift yet?
123
00:08:11,878 --> 00:08:14,882
No, I haven't found anything yet.
124
00:08:14,948 --> 00:08:17,827
Yeah, well, it'd better be something great,
because I saw what she got you.
125
00:08:17,884 --> 00:08:19,886
Oh, you lucky son of a gun.
126
00:08:25,225 --> 00:08:29,173
I was thinking about getting her,
you know, a suede coat.
127
00:08:29,229 --> 00:08:31,436
Is that all?
128
00:08:33,967 --> 00:08:36,277
With a suede skirt.
129
00:08:36,336 --> 00:08:38,839
Is that all?
130
00:08:38,905 --> 00:08:40,976
What's she getting me, Howard?
131
00:08:44,811 --> 00:08:47,519
I'm not gonna tell you.
132
00:08:47,580 --> 00:08:49,651
You lucky son of a gun.
133
00:08:49,716 --> 00:08:52,526
[Elevator Bell Dings]
134
00:08:52,585 --> 00:08:55,794
Coming out.
Excuse me, please. Pardon me.
135
00:08:57,457 --> 00:08:59,960
Merry Christmas.
136
00:09:00,026 --> 00:09:02,370
It is a madhouse out there.
137
00:09:02,428 --> 00:09:04,374
Did you find something nice
for Emily?
138
00:09:04,430 --> 00:09:06,740
- Not yet.
- Bob.
139
00:09:06,799 --> 00:09:08,710
I just haven't found
the right thing yet.
140
00:09:08,768 --> 00:09:11,180
You better find something
you like pretty quick...
141
00:09:11,237 --> 00:09:13,183
oryou'll be gift wrapping
an empty box.
142
00:09:13,239 --> 00:09:15,344
[Laughing]
143
00:09:16,376 --> 00:09:18,549
A little Christmas humor.
144
00:09:19,979 --> 00:09:21,925
That, uh, that isn't
coffee in there, is it?
145
00:09:21,981 --> 00:09:23,961
Nope, eggnog-
146
00:09:25,718 --> 00:09:28,062
Tupperman filled
the watercooler with it.
147
00:09:29,322 --> 00:09:31,802
Bob, I gotta tell you something.
148
00:09:31,858 --> 00:09:34,395
I'm swacked.
149
00:09:34,460 --> 00:09:36,064
No kidding.
150
00:09:36,129 --> 00:09:38,473
Hey, Bob, what are you doing here?
I thought you left.
151
00:09:38,531 --> 00:09:40,670
I had to get back
for my 3:00 appointment.
152
00:09:40,733 --> 00:09:43,577
Oh, forgot to tell you.
Your 3:00 called and canceled.
153
00:09:48,074 --> 00:09:50,384
Carol, are there any other calls
you forgot to tell me about?
154
00:09:50,443 --> 00:09:53,720
Uh,just one.
Some old man called long-distance.
155
00:09:53,780 --> 00:09:56,124
Wanted to know if you've been
a good little boy this year.
156
00:09:57,784 --> 00:09:59,855
[Jerry Laughs]
157
00:10:05,758 --> 00:10:08,705
Bob, why don't you have one?
Come on, it'll loosen you up a little.
158
00:10:08,761 --> 00:10:10,707
No, I still have to
find a gift for Emily.
159
00:10:10,763 --> 00:10:13,539
Okay. I'll just have yours.
160
00:10:15,535 --> 00:10:19,312
Hey, Bob, you mean you still didn't get
a present for Emily? What are you waiting for?
161
00:10:19,372 --> 00:10:23,218
I haven't found the right thing.
I want something,you know, personal.
162
00:10:23,276 --> 00:10:25,278
How about a Water Pik?
163
00:10:30,049 --> 00:10:33,553
Jerry, I don't know how to tell you this,
but for people who aren't dentists...
164
00:10:33,619 --> 00:10:37,089
there isn't a lot of sentimentality
connected with Water Piks.
165
00:10:37,156 --> 00:10:39,966
- Gee, you think my mother won't like hers?
- [ Elevator Bell Dings]
166
00:10:40,026 --> 00:10:42,097
Have a nice Christmas.
167
00:10:42,161 --> 00:10:45,574
[jerry] Oh, excuse me.
Pardon me. Come on. Doctors coming--
168
00:10:45,631 --> 00:10:49,078
Excuse me. Excuse me.
Pardon me. I'm coming through.
169
00:10:49,135 --> 00:10:51,240
Bob? Bob, you in here?
170
00:11:12,091 --> 00:11:14,037
_ Emily?
_ Bob?
171
00:11:15,161 --> 00:11:17,107
Honey, where have you been?
172
00:11:17,163 --> 00:11:22,203
Don't ask. The, uh,
the important thing is--
173
00:11:22,268 --> 00:11:24,714
Merry Christmas.
174
00:11:28,207 --> 00:11:30,483
- Merry Christmas, honey.
- Hope you like it.
175
00:11:32,745 --> 00:11:35,385
Oh. Oh, Bob!
176
00:11:35,448 --> 00:11:37,826
Oh, I love it.
177
00:11:37,884 --> 00:11:39,830
I wonder what it is.
178
00:11:39,886 --> 00:11:41,832
Honey, where did you hide it?
179
00:11:45,892 --> 00:11:49,032
Oh, I played it smart this year.
I let the department store hide it...
180
00:11:49,095 --> 00:11:51,041
and then I picked it up
at the last minute.
181
00:11:51,097 --> 00:11:53,907
- Oh, that was smart.
- I thought so.
182
00:11:53,966 --> 00:11:56,310
Well, uh, I'll get yours.
183
00:12:04,310 --> 00:12:07,189
Merry Christmas.
184
00:12:11,284 --> 00:12:14,527
AII-- All those gifts are for me?
185
00:12:14,587 --> 00:12:17,295
Wait. I'll get more.
186
00:12:22,195 --> 00:12:24,334
Honey?
187
00:12:34,774 --> 00:12:36,947
Bob, where are you going?
188
00:12:37,009 --> 00:12:39,888
I forgot a newspaper.
189
00:12:39,946 --> 00:12:42,051
I got my checkbook.
190
00:12:47,620 --> 00:12:49,861
Man On TV]
This is WKS-TV, Chicago...
191
00:12:49,922 --> 00:12:51,868
wishing you a joyous
Christmas Eve.
192
00:12:51,924 --> 00:12:53,870
♪♪ [ TV: Christmas]
193
00:12:53,926 --> 00:12:56,600
What else is on, honey?
194
00:12:56,662 --> 00:12:59,404
I don't know.
195
00:12:59,465 --> 00:13:01,911
- [Clicks Button]
- [Channel Changes]
196
00:13:01,968 --> 00:13:04,881
[ Man]
lam the Ghost of Christmas Past.
197
00:13:04,937 --> 00:13:07,577
- Dickens's Christmas Carol
- What do you want with me?
198
00:13:07,640 --> 00:13:10,678
- We saw it.
- [Channel Changes]
199
00:13:10,743 --> 00:13:14,054
♪♪ [ Nutcracker Suite ]
200
00:13:16,883 --> 00:13:18,988
- [Channel Changes]
- Saw it.
201
00:13:19,051 --> 00:13:21,998
[Man ] And she hits her again.
Tuffy Lamont is off the track.
202
00:13:22,054 --> 00:13:25,228
She's over the rail. And Betty Colavito
is kicking her with her skates.
203
00:13:25,291 --> 00:13:27,999
Whoa, Nellie!
204
00:13:28,060 --> 00:13:31,007
Boy, they don't stop
for anything, do they?
205
00:13:31,063 --> 00:13:34,636
-;;[Christmas]
- Oh.
206
00:13:34,700 --> 00:13:39,012
You know, Perry Como looks younger today
than he did 1 O years ago.
207
00:13:39,071 --> 00:13:42,245
- Yea h.
- [ Doorbell Buzzes ]
208
00:13:42,308 --> 00:13:44,345
Are you expecting anybody
on Christmas Eve?
209
00:13:44,410 --> 00:13:46,913
Only from the chimney.
210
00:13:52,351 --> 00:13:54,331
- Hi, Bob. Aha!
- Hi, Howard.
211
00:13:56,622 --> 00:14:00,798
L, uh, I just wanted
to come over and say good-bye...
212
00:14:00,860 --> 00:14:03,864
- and wish you both a merry Christmas.
- Merry Christmas, Howard.
213
00:14:03,930 --> 00:14:07,207
- Where're you off to, Howard?
- France.
214
00:14:07,266 --> 00:14:09,143
You're working on Christmas Eve?
215
00:14:09,201 --> 00:14:11,647
Yeah, ever since I've been divorced,
I always work Christmas Eve.
216
00:14:11,704 --> 00:14:13,775
It gives the married guys
a chance to be with their families.
217
00:14:13,839 --> 00:14:18,811
- Oh, that's very sweet, Howard. - Yeah,
besides, the pay's time and a half for holidays.
218
00:14:18,878 --> 00:14:23,190
Well, I guess I'll go over andjust hang around
the airport until my flight leaves.
219
00:14:23,249 --> 00:14:25,126
How long doyou
have to hang around?
220
00:14:25,184 --> 00:14:27,755
Oh, uh,
seven or eight hours.
221
00:14:29,422 --> 00:14:31,527
Well, merry Christmas.
222
00:14:34,260 --> 00:14:37,104
Don't be silly, Howard.
You'll spend Christmas Eve with us.
223
00:14:37,163 --> 00:14:39,370
- Yeah, come on.
- I couldn't do that. You're celebrating Christmas.
224
00:14:39,432 --> 00:14:41,708
- Oh, don't be silly.
- No, no, we'rejust--
225
00:14:41,767 --> 00:14:43,974
- we're sitting watching Perry Como.
- Is that Perry Como?
226
00:14:44,036 --> 00:14:45,982
His hair looks darker
than last year.
227
00:14:46,038 --> 00:14:48,314
Oh, isn't that funny?
We werejust saying that.
228
00:14:48,374 --> 00:14:50,320
You want a hot toddy?
229
00:14:50,376 --> 00:14:52,583
No, I'm flying.
Do you have any soup?
230
00:14:55,081 --> 00:14:57,027
I'll look.
231
00:14:58,651 --> 00:15:02,258
I wanna thank you both for that basket of fruit.
It was really huge.
232
00:15:02,321 --> 00:15:04,733
You know there was
a watermelon on the bottom?
233
00:15:06,258 --> 00:15:08,568
We're really glad
you liked it, Howard.
234
00:15:08,628 --> 00:15:12,735
We didn't have any soup, Howard,
so here's some warm cream soda.
235
00:15:12,798 --> 00:15:15,039
Oh.
236
00:15:18,004 --> 00:15:20,382
Well, uh, merry Christmas.
237
00:15:20,439 --> 00:15:22,419
Oh, happy New Year.
238
00:15:22,475 --> 00:15:24,978
And no air pockets
on the way to France.
239
00:15:28,147 --> 00:15:30,388
You know, it's a funny thing
about Christmas.
240
00:15:30,449 --> 00:15:34,591
I mean, we have so much.
You know, we have each other.
241
00:15:34,654 --> 00:15:36,600
A good friend.
242
00:15:37,657 --> 00:15:39,659
A warm home.
243
00:15:41,227 --> 00:15:45,733
Perry Como.
We-- We got everything.
244
00:15:45,798 --> 00:15:50,042
- Still, there's something missing.
- I know.
245
00:15:50,102 --> 00:15:52,378
It just seems like Christmas
should have kids running around...
246
00:15:52,438 --> 00:15:54,577
and grandmas
and lots of people.
247
00:15:54,640 --> 00:15:56,711
You think it's bad here?
You should be at my place.
248
00:15:56,776 --> 00:16:00,553
You know, I refuse
to let Christmas get me down.
249
00:16:02,548 --> 00:16:05,495
- Honey, do you wanna go to a party?
- Well, sure. Where?
250
00:16:05,551 --> 00:16:07,497
Right here.
251
00:16:07,553 --> 00:16:10,466
Bob, where are you gonna find a bunch of
people with nothing to do on Christmas Eve?
252
00:16:10,523 --> 00:16:13,936
Honey, in my business,
that shouldn't be any problem.
253
00:16:20,366 --> 00:16:23,074
Bob, don't you think
that's enough people?
254
00:16:28,507 --> 00:16:30,453
Yeah, I guess you're right.
255
00:16:30,509 --> 00:16:33,513
Honey, you know these people
better than I do.
256
00:16:33,579 --> 00:16:36,185
Are they having a good time?
257
00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:43,166
For them? Yes.
258
00:16:43,222 --> 00:16:45,429
Excuse me, Dr. Hartley.
259
00:16:45,491 --> 00:16:48,028
Uh, do you have a restroom?
260
00:16:49,361 --> 00:16:51,307
As a matter of fact,
we have two of them.
261
00:16:51,363 --> 00:16:54,640
Oh, good.
Where's the men's?
262
00:16:54,700 --> 00:16:59,149
No, you don't understand, Barry.
This is my home, not my office.
263
00:16:59,205 --> 00:17:01,708
I was making a joke.
264
00:17:01,774 --> 00:17:04,277
Oh, oh.
[Laughs]
265
00:17:04,343 --> 00:17:06,289
That-- That was very funny.
266
00:17:06,345 --> 00:17:08,985
You didn't think
it was funny at all.
267
00:17:09,048 --> 00:17:11,324
Yes,yes, I did.
I thought it was very funny.
268
00:17:11,383 --> 00:17:14,193
- Didn't I think it was funny, Emily?
- Oh, yes, he did.
269
00:17:14,253 --> 00:17:16,392
So did I. I laughed.
270
00:17:16,455 --> 00:17:19,561
Your wife didn't think
it was funny either. I'm sorry.
271
00:17:21,060 --> 00:17:24,598
Oh, did I say
something wrong?
272
00:17:24,663 --> 00:17:26,609
Honey, you did fine.
just fine.
273
00:17:26,665 --> 00:17:31,114
- But I think we'd better mingle and
brighten things up. - Okay. See you.
274
00:17:31,170 --> 00:17:35,550
I mean, it's ridiculous for anybody
to be afraid of flying these days.
275
00:17:35,608 --> 00:17:38,714
Dr. Hartley's been telling me
the same thing, but I'm still afraid.
276
00:17:38,778 --> 00:17:41,987
Do you realize that flying
is safer than driving?
277
00:17:42,047 --> 00:17:45,927
I know.
I'm afraid to drive too.
278
00:17:45,985 --> 00:17:48,898
- How do you get where you're going?
- I walk.
279
00:17:48,954 --> 00:17:50,934
Oh, well, more people are hurt
walking than flying.
280
00:17:50,990 --> 00:17:53,163
Maybe I shouldn't
walk so much.
281
00:17:54,693 --> 00:17:56,866
Uh, excuse me, Howard.
Mrs. Bakerman...
282
00:17:56,929 --> 00:18:01,503
what Howard's trying to explain
is that accidents happen anywhere.
283
00:18:01,567 --> 00:18:04,707
I mean, like right now,
somewhere in the United States...
284
00:18:04,770 --> 00:18:08,183
someone could be falling offa couch
and hurting themselves.
285
00:18:10,075 --> 00:18:12,555
Really?
286
00:18:12,611 --> 00:18:16,957
Mrs. Bakerman, everyone's a little on edge
tonight. Do you wanna sit down?
287
00:18:18,350 --> 00:18:21,888
Uh, everyone?
Um, it is Christmas Eve...
288
00:18:21,954 --> 00:18:24,366
so I think we should
have some fun.
289
00:18:24,423 --> 00:18:27,267
[All Agreeing]
290
00:18:27,326 --> 00:18:29,272
Mrs. Bakerman,
you wanna sit down?
291
00:18:29,328 --> 00:18:31,604
Yes, of course.
292
00:18:31,664 --> 00:18:36,204
All right, everybody wanna--
wanna form sort of a little circle.
293
00:18:36,268 --> 00:18:40,546
Now this may sound corny, but,
well, I feel like singing Christmas carols.
294
00:18:40,606 --> 00:18:42,745
[All Agreeing]
295
00:18:42,808 --> 00:18:45,584
It's safe to sit down,
Mrs. Bakerman.
296
00:18:46,879 --> 00:18:48,825
Which one should we sing first?
297
00:18:48,881 --> 00:18:51,225
Uh, how about
“O Come All Ye Faithful“?
298
00:18:51,283 --> 00:18:53,126
Very nice. I like that.
299
00:18:53,185 --> 00:18:56,632
Would anybody mind
if we didn't sing “O Come All Ye Faithful“?
300
00:18:56,689 --> 00:19:00,831
- Ken, why?
- Well, when I was a kid, I went to military school.
301
00:19:00,893 --> 00:19:04,067
And during Christmas,
when everybody went home, I stayed.
302
00:19:04,129 --> 00:19:08,077
Thejanitor and I used to sing “O Come
All Ye Faithful“ to cheer ourselves up.
303
00:19:08,133 --> 00:19:10,272
And I'd much rather have been
with my mom and dad...
304
00:19:10,336 --> 00:19:13,078
but they were divorced,
and neither of them really wanted me.
305
00:19:13,138 --> 00:19:14,845
[All]
Oh.
306
00:19:14,907 --> 00:19:18,150
I'm getting a very sad feeling
in my stomach right now.
307
00:19:18,210 --> 00:19:21,987
I know what you mean.
I'm-- I'm divorced...
308
00:19:22,047 --> 00:19:24,687
and I'd like to be
with my son right now too.
309
00:19:24,750 --> 00:19:30,063
- He's in Duluth,you know.
- That's a shame.
310
00:19:30,122 --> 00:19:32,329
I could be with my son
right now...
311
00:19:32,391 --> 00:19:35,304
if there was just a train
that went to Hawaii.
312
00:19:39,198 --> 00:19:41,610
All right, maybe
we picked the wrong carol.
313
00:19:41,667 --> 00:19:45,774
Uh, how about “O Little Town
of Bethlehem“? Now that's a fun carol.
314
00:19:45,838 --> 00:19:47,784
That is.
That's a fun carol.
315
00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:50,047
- Do you like that carol, Ken?
- Yeah, I like that carol.
316
00:19:50,109 --> 00:19:52,111
Oh, good.
Honey, why don't you start?
317
00:19:52,177 --> 00:19:55,215
- Could I talk to you for a minute, Dr. Hartley?
- Yes, Barry, what is it?
318
00:19:55,281 --> 00:19:58,455
Well, the water pressure
in your bathroom sink was kind of low...
319
00:19:58,517 --> 00:20:00,463
sol thought I'd turn it up.
320
00:20:00,519 --> 00:20:03,193
Well, you know the thing
under the sink that you turn?
321
00:20:03,255 --> 00:20:06,828
Well, anyway, I turned it, and then
the water pressure got real strong.
322
00:20:06,892 --> 00:20:11,034
- Well, that's good.
- And then the faucet popped off.
323
00:20:11,096 --> 00:20:14,009
Oh, no, is there water
spilling out all over there?
324
00:20:14,066 --> 00:20:18,139
Not anymore.
I jammed a robe in the pipe.
325
00:20:18,203 --> 00:20:21,548
I'm sorry. I'll pay for a plumber
if you can find one on Christmas Eve.
326
00:20:21,607 --> 00:20:24,349
No, no, it happens all the time.
327
00:20:24,410 --> 00:20:26,447
Barry, you wanna--
you wanna grab a seat?
328
00:20:26,512 --> 00:20:29,356
We're gonna sing--
We're gonna sing some Christmas carols.
329
00:20:29,415 --> 00:20:33,522
Uh, okay, everybody know
“O Little Town of Bethlehem“?
330
00:20:33,585 --> 00:20:36,725
Oh, gee, I don't think
I oughta sing that song.
331
00:20:36,789 --> 00:20:39,030
Why not?
332
00:20:39,091 --> 00:20:41,571
I'm halfjewish.
333
00:20:45,164 --> 00:20:48,407
Then why don't you just hum?
334
00:20:50,069 --> 00:20:53,073
Maybe I'd better leave.
I'm spoiling this party for everybody.
335
00:20:53,138 --> 00:20:56,210
I feel very unhappy that Barry
isn't having a good time here.
336
00:20:56,275 --> 00:20:58,016
Me too.
I'm beginning to feel real bad.
337
00:20:58,077 --> 00:21:02,856
- I wonder what my son is doing now.
- Yeah, me too.
338
00:21:02,915 --> 00:21:05,521
I wanna cry.
339
00:21:05,584 --> 00:21:08,497
- Honey, we'll get a plumber.
- No, not about that.
340
00:21:08,554 --> 00:21:11,763
I just feel sad
and I don't know why.
341
00:21:11,824 --> 00:21:15,499
Well, I know why. I invited everyone
over here to have a good time...
342
00:21:15,561 --> 00:21:20,032
and everyone's getting depressed
because this is probably...
343
00:21:20,099 --> 00:21:22,807
the worst party
I've ever been to in my life.
344
00:21:22,868 --> 00:21:25,974
And it's all my fault,
and I feel very bad about it.
345
00:21:26,038 --> 00:21:28,109
- [All Disagreeing]
- Hey, you know?
346
00:21:28,173 --> 00:21:30,744
I really like you saying
this is a bad party...
347
00:21:30,809 --> 00:21:33,881
because if you hadn't said it, I'd have
thought this was a good party...
348
00:21:33,946 --> 00:21:36,017
and I was the only one
having a bad time.
349
00:21:36,081 --> 00:21:39,585
Well, now I know the reason I'm having
a bad time is 'cause this is a bad party.
350
00:21:39,651 --> 00:21:42,825
- [All Agreeing]
- It makes me feel pretty good.
351
00:21:44,623 --> 00:21:46,899
You know, I'm glad
you said that too...
352
00:21:46,959 --> 00:21:49,496
because I thought
this bad party was my fault.
353
00:21:49,561 --> 00:21:52,735
But now that I know
that it's not, I'm happy.
354
00:21:52,798 --> 00:21:56,803
And I thought that I was having
a bad time because I wasn't dressed right.
355
00:21:56,869 --> 00:22:00,908
Oh, well, I don't know quite how to say this,
'cause I'm kind of new at it--
356
00:22:00,973 --> 00:22:03,351
Well, honey, you just say
whatever you feel.
357
00:22:03,409 --> 00:22:08,518
Oh, well, I just feel great 'cause we're
all having such a rotten time together.
358
00:22:08,580 --> 00:22:10,856
[All Laughing]
359
00:22:10,916 --> 00:22:15,296
- And I feel like singing “O Little
Town of Bethlehem.“ - [Ail Agreeing]
360
00:22:15,354 --> 00:22:17,459
- [Howard] Who's gonna start?
- U h, Barry?
361
00:22:17,523 --> 00:22:20,436
Why not?
What could happen?
362
00:22:20,492 --> 00:22:26,443
- Oh, Barry!
- ♪ O little town of Bethlehem ♪
363
00:22:26,498 --> 00:22:30,503
- ♪ How still we see thee lie ♪
- [ Doorbell Buzzes ]
364
00:22:30,569 --> 00:22:33,448
♪ Above thy deep and dreamless sleep ♪
365
00:22:33,505 --> 00:22:35,451
- Merry Christmas, Bob.
- Merry ChristmasJerry.
366
00:22:35,507 --> 00:22:38,044
- Grab a seat and start singing.
- Listen, I have to interrupt for a second.
367
00:22:38,110 --> 00:22:40,056
It's very important.
368
00:22:40,112 --> 00:22:42,422
-;; [ Continues]
- Uh, excuse mejust a minute.
369
00:22:42,481 --> 00:22:45,485
- This isjerry Robinsonjerry, this is our group.
- Oh, hi.
370
00:22:45,551 --> 00:22:47,758
-[All] HLJerry.
- I'm sorry to interrupt...
371
00:22:47,820 --> 00:22:50,130
but does anyone have a '61 blue Ford
parked out in front?
372
00:22:50,189 --> 00:22:52,226
- I do.
- They're towing it away.
373
00:22:54,393 --> 00:22:57,533
I knewl shouldn't
have sung that song.
374
00:22:58,630 --> 00:23:01,076
[Carol ]
I'm sorry you have to leave.
375
00:23:02,601 --> 00:23:04,547
You know something?
I'm not leaving.
376
00:23:04,603 --> 00:23:08,141
I'm not going to spend Christmas Eve
in the police garage.
377
00:23:08,207 --> 00:23:10,517
I just spent Thanksgiving there.
378
00:23:10,576 --> 00:23:12,522
Anyway, I'm having
too good of a time here.
379
00:23:12,578 --> 00:23:14,751
[All Cheering]
380
00:23:14,813 --> 00:23:17,054
Let 'em take the car.
I don't care.
381
00:23:17,116 --> 00:23:20,495
Well, everybody, shall we start?
I have a new one. Ready?
382
00:23:20,552 --> 00:23:24,261
♪ Deck the halls
with boughs of holly;
383
00:23:24,323 --> 00:23:27,896
;Fa la la la la, la la la la;
384
00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:31,430
♪ 'Tis the season to bejolly;
385
00:23:31,497 --> 00:23:35,274
-;Fa la la la la, la la la la;
- What's the mattenjerry?
386
00:23:35,334 --> 00:23:37,336
- ♪ Don we now our gay apparel ♪
- I don't know.
387
00:23:37,402 --> 00:23:41,350
Maybe it's because I came late.
Everybody's having such a good time and all.
388
00:23:41,406 --> 00:23:44,285
I just feel kind of left out.
It makes me feel kind ofsad.
389
00:23:44,343 --> 00:23:47,381
- What, sad? Did he say sad?
- Sad? Who? What?
390
00:23:47,446 --> 00:23:49,221
- Somebody said sad?
- No, no.
391
00:23:49,281 --> 00:23:51,852
No, he said glad.
He said he feels glad.
392
00:23:51,917 --> 00:23:55,865
- [All ] Oh.
- Trust me,jerry,just start singing.
393
00:23:55,921 --> 00:23:58,800
♪ Deck the halls
with boughs of holly;
394
00:23:58,857 --> 00:24:02,168
;Fa la la la la, la la la la;
395
00:24:02,227 --> 00:24:05,436
♪ 'Tis the season to bejolly;
396
00:24:05,497 --> 00:24:08,000
;Fa la la la la, la la la la;
397
00:24:20,512 --> 00:24:24,289
Well, Bob Hartley, you made
a lot of people very happy tonight.
398
00:24:24,349 --> 00:24:26,920
Are you happy?
399
00:24:27,953 --> 00:24:29,899
Mm am.
400
00:24:29,955 --> 00:24:31,992
- Merry Christmas, sweetheart.
- Merry Christmas.
401
00:24:33,792 --> 00:24:35,965
Oh.
402
00:24:39,064 --> 00:24:42,375
♪ Deck the halls with boughs of holly;
403
00:24:42,434 --> 00:24:45,677
;Fa la la la la, la la la la;
404
00:24:45,737 --> 00:24:48,741
♪ 'Tis the season to bejolly;
405
00:24:48,807 --> 00:24:51,947
;Fa la la la la, la la la la;
406
00:24:52,010 --> 00:24:55,355
♪ DOT"! we HOW OLJI' gay apparel ♪
407
00:24:55,414 --> 00:24:58,520
♪ Fa la la, la la la, la la la ♪
408
00:24:58,584 --> 00:25:01,827
♪ Troll the ancient Yuletide carol ♪
409
00:25:01,887 --> 00:25:06,700
♪ Fa la la la la, la la la la ♪♪
410
00:25:08,393 --> 00:25:09,770
[Mews]